This Autism Journey

I was listening to a program on NPR called “Here and Now”, and the guests were Kara Goucher and Des Linden. They were discussing the Boston Marathon, which they both have run and won – no small feat! It was an inspiring discussion, and one thing that stood out to me was when they mentioned to make running fun again, it’s best to stop focusing on time and to stop worrying about the clock.

Noticing delays

You might be thinking what does this have anything to do with parenting kids with Autism? Well, it’s about time. Many parents, not all, start to see their children fall behind in their developmental milestones and start to become concerned that perhaps something more is going on. As a parent, I know that I brought up my concerns with our pediatrician. There was a small amount of time where we had a wait-and-see approach but during that waiting period it was obvious that things were off track. These milestones are markers for typical development but what happens when your child isn’t reaching these milestones?

I know I started to panic a little and immediately started to think of ways that I could get him caught up. I was completely ignorant of the fact that we would have to blaze a trail on our own.

Acceptance

I was resistant at first but life started to change when I began to ignore the clock. I began to live in the “now” and not in the “where he should be”.

I am not the most patient woman and I always find myself trying to speed up a process that just seems to be taking too long. Unfortunately, I’m sure my impatience often expressed itself in a critical manner even though that was never my intent. I just wanted him to catch up and be like the other kids. I know now that approach was not helpful. It was and still can be hard to accept that my child is behind.

I am learning that falling behind doesn’t mean staying behind. It just means later. Later isn’t bad, nor is later something to be ashamed of. It just takes a little more time to get there but eventually you do get there. Patience, understanding, and ditching the clock make reaching these milestones attainable. After all, “All things come to those who wait”.

Take Care!